The Many Deaths of Roger Wilco
"The place where every day is a good day to die."

Space Quest 1 VGA - Kerona Surface

Go too far out in the desert and get eaten by a Grell.

Whoa! Those big guys pack a powerful appetite. Did you feel the way that thing just chomped through your skeletal system? That had to hurt! The grell burps in solitary satisfaction. He doesn't often get nice, warm meals like you.


Use the hand icon in the hole on the side of the skeleton.

Cautiously you decide to investigate further.

That should teach you not to be messing around in strange holes.


Get blown up by the Sarien Spider Droid.

How convenient! You've been blown into bite-sized chunks. I guess that Space Piston article wasn't fiction. There's nothing quite like stretching out and enjoying the wide-open spaces.


Get turned into a plaything by Orat.


Orat has transformed you into a new piece of recreational equipment. Along with finding this treatment extremely rude, you don't survive it.

It's tough to make friends around here. Relax, stretch out, restore, and let's get back to it. There's adventuring to be done!


Walk across the bridge too many times.

You've always got to push things to the limit, don't you? We warned you, but NO! YOU had to do it just one more time. Well, just wait 'till your father gets home!


Go for too long without water and die of thirst.

(1st warning to drink something)

A nice slug of water would hit the spot right about now.

(2nd warning to drink something)

The heat of this place sure can dehydrate a person. You'd better get something to drink pretty darn soon.

(too late)

Holy antiperspirant, dehydroman! The searing heat and dryness of this enviroment sucks the vital fluids from your body. You mind begins to drift uncontrollably.

Roger: Mommy! Is that you? Mommy, how come all the other guys in class get new mops and I don't?

Mercifully (for all of us), you die before the hallucinations get too hokey. It won't be long before you look like a scaled-down version of the skeletal structure occupying several hectares nearby.

Within a few hours, your gaunt corpse will have dried to a crisp, your powdered remains evenly distributed across the parched terrain by a searing gust.


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This site was created by Liz Calkins on June 18, 2001.